I know I want to write abit about this word, what it means and how I feel about it. But suddenly I don't "trust" my fingers to say whats in my head. Another word that comes to mind right now is "honesty". I wonder how honest I can be about how I feel about trust! The two words go hand and hand don't they? I mean I can only trust honest people right? I have to be "honest" with myself and "trust" my own instincts.
This trust thing is tricky. Its not healthy to not be able to trust ANYONE. But...its dangerous to trust too much. And we learn one from the other. I mean...Ive trusted too much and learned not too. Now I find I am having trouble trusting and that's proving to be very unhealthy for my relationship, and my sanity!
So...I guess the reason I'm writing about this issue is because.. "It is an issue". I mean it is truly a struggle everyday. But I am determined to let things roll off my back. Ya know, sometimes I think to myself "just trust it, don't worry about it and if your wrong you can worry about it then". But that's just stupid!! If I wait to worry about someone being dishonest after I have trusted them then they will screw me over and it will be MY FAULT! and I will say to myself again "you knew better Cheryl!" But on the other hand.....Think of what I will learn if I trust someone and they are honest and worthy of my trust in them. That is truly the only way I will learn to trust again. To JUST DO IT!
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